The Power of an Avoided Argument
“If you want to stop an argument, close your mouth.” (Charles Swindoll) How many needless fights are kept alive because we think we have to prove ourselves right? And why? Many of the things we argue about really hold no importance in the grand scheme of things. Yet, we are often willing to destroy relationships over issues that truly do not matter. We may prove ourselves right, we may ‘win’ the argument’, but at what cost? Once spoken, those words cannot be erased from the remembrance of those who heard them. This is exactly what Satan wants. He wants to destroy our relationships, make us second guess ourselves and those around us, and fracture the unity God so clearly calls us to. These are the battles we face each and every day. We don’t need to fall for the trap, though. We don’t need to allow disagreements to destroy our peace.
In order to truly separate ourselves from potential conflict, we must completely hand those things to God and refuse to enter into the argument, both literally and mentally. This is the example Jesus gave us in today’s reading. He could have answered the chief priests and the scribes and elders. He could have used the opportunity to rebuke them (as he often did) for their wicked behavior. Yet, he didn’t. He turned the tables right back onto them and placed the challenge in their laps. Jesus knew their question was not asked out of a longing for an answer. They wanted to trap him. They wanted to discredit him, but Jesus refused to attend their vicious party. He remained aloof and allowed their poison darts to circle back to those who spoke them. I have to admit, that is not my natural response. I might not say something in the moment, but I won’t let it go, either. I search for that perfect comeback, yet Jesus showed us the perfect response is very often no response at all.
“The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.” (James 3:7-8) Just a few verses later, James wrote, “But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.” (verses 14-18)
Let us ask God for the wisdom to know when to close our mouth. Let us focus on God’s big picture and not our own agenda or pride. We are not going to be everyone’s cup of tea, and that is okay. As much as I long to get that last word, to prove I am smart, to appear superior, this is not my battle. My life is not my own. Remember verse 13 from James 3, “Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom.”
(Written by Keegan Harkins.)
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