Not My Will
Gethsemane means “olive press”. It was a place where olive trees had grown for centuries. This was where the olives were crushed to release their oil. It was also the place where our Lord was crushed under the weight of realization about his upcoming sacrifice. The weight of what he was about to do almost broke him. He told his friends that he was greatly distressed and troubled. “He said to them, ‘My soul is very sorrowful, even to death…” (verse 34) Have you ever felt the crushing weight of life? Sorrow can devastate us. It can steal our breath and trample upon our hearts. We have all felt sorrow from time to time, but I doubt any of us have felt the weight Jesus felt in the garden of Gethsemane.
Jesus’ prayer during this time has been an inspiration of mine for years. Life is not easy. We have all seen sorrows and felt pain. This isn’t our destination, and it was never meant to be free from stress or strife. If we were comfortable in this world, we would have to examine our heart. We should long for the next life. We should long for the streets of heaven even while we enjoy and be productive here in this life. And while we struggle here on earth, there will be times when we don’t understand God’s path. If we understand it, we may fear it or dread it. We may know the why but not feel so comfortable with the how. Yet, like Jesus, we have no other option than to say, “Yet not what I will, but what thou wilt.” (verse 36)
Obedience is a beautiful thing. We struggle against it in our society. For years, I was so rebellious that if someone told me to do something, I would eagerly and very publicly do the opposite. Independence is praised. Freedom is fought for and rallied for, but what are we wanting to be independent of? If we truly trust God, we will have no desire to be free of His commands. When we give ourselves to our Heavenly Father and tell Him, ‘Not my will but thine,’ then we are truly free. Submission, obedience, servitude – those words have been twisted by a world that seeks to do the very opposite to everything God asks. We should be different. We need to be different. In fact, it is that difference that is our gift back to our God. God has given us everything. Can we not give Him back just a bit of our heart? Can we not give Him our complete trust? It doesn’t have to be easy. Jesus sweat drops of blood, so great was the stress he was under. Let us not believe that our fear or stress negates our faith. Perhaps it even deepens it. When we believe and trust through the pain, the tears, and the fear, that is when we know the true depth of our belief in our Holy God. That is when we know just how much we mean, ‘Not my will but thine.’
(Written by Keegan Harkins.)
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